Ripping The Bandaid
Okay, if I’m being honest, I truly don’t know where to begin. On October 15, 2018 I posted something on social media that I never have before. Something I have always felt comfortable with on the surface, but have blindly turned away from within my core. While that previous sentence certainly has many layers (some not even I can fully grasp at this moment), I have made a personal promise to myself to explore them. Explore the ways I feel, others feel, the way the world interprets certain realities, and the way the mind has the ability to shape positive outcomes no matter the journey.
The social media post I’m referring to can be viewed here. But long story short, it’s the first time I shared a self-reflection about my experiences of living with Cerebral Palsy (CP). If you ask me about it, I’ll tell you a brief medical definition and share how it doesn’t negatively impact my life or hold me back from what I strive to achieve. I’m open about it, completely, and it’s always my goal to make everyone I’m around feel comfortable. That’s why you’ll always catch me with a smile on my face, laughing hysterically when I fall, or making fun of myself in the most lighthearted way possible. But I have never gone out of my way to bring attention to it.
Through my quarter-of-a-century journey of committing myself to ensuring that those around me are comfortable with my disability, I’ve realized I haven’t truly given myself the same commitment. This self-realization has just simply scratched the surface as I strive to understand my life, experiences, disability, mind and purpose.
I’ve always envisioned myself writing a book later in my career to really dive into this aspect of my life, but recently I decided there is no reason to wait. Leading to my social media post on random night when I was deep in my feelings, in an effort to hold myself accountable.
While I’ve struggled the past few months to jump back into exploring the depths of my feelings, I am here now to officially begin my new avenue of expressing my experiences through this blog.
As this first segue blog post from social media to website is on the serious side – I’m looking forward to incorporating my quite unique real- life stories throughout this endeavor. I’m excited to share my authentic self with not only those I’m lucky enough to cross paths with, but myself.